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Main › Health & Therapy › Weight Reduction
 

Want Power Before Will Power

 
Author: Kathryn Martyn, M.NLP

The problem isn't that you don't have enough will power to achieve what you want. You have will power, but it's not will power you need, it's want power.

You have to first want

You must want to change your habits, want to lose some weight, want to give up your evening snacking before your will comes into play. Once you want a thing badly enough, you will do whatever it takes.

If you think you want something (to make a change in your eating habits perhaps), but then find it difficult to follow-through with your plans, most likely you simply want your current reality (your current habits and patterns) more than you want your goals (less weight, better health, etc.)

I can hear you all the way over here, telling me I'm wrong: "No, that's not right! I want this more than anything, I just don't have any willpower!" Round and round you go, but the truth is, you will get what you really want. Think back, has there ever been a time when you really wanted something? A certain piece of clothing, a certain house, car, job, spouse? Hum... Yes, we go after what we want, if we really want to acquire or achieve it we do. Nothings going to fall in your lap, you've got to go get what you want.

What's Going on?

Put another way, you may want to avoid the pain (breaking old habits, avoiding some favorite foods, simply not overeating...) more than you want to gain the pleasure (losing some weight, gaining new habits, eating favorite foods in moderation ...)

Since losing weight takes time, from weeks to months to years, it's easy to fall off the path. It's always easier to get back into our old habits of eating, eating, and more eating. There's always more food. Unless you are too poor to purchase it, there's plenty food in America - in fact, too much food, and so it becomes even more necessary to keep the longer-term goals in mind.

How do you keep the longer-term goals in mind, when the short-term food is staring you in the face? What about all the treats offered, what about the commercials, the billboards, the signs everywhere that say EAT?

Wanting, in fact, is the "W", the first step in the W.H.A.C.K approach. See it in the free e-book, Changing Beliefs, Your First Step to Permanent Weight Loss.

Think back to when you last really wanted something. Wanted it more than anything, had to have it, would do just about anything to get it. To want is a mighty powerful motivator, but surprisingly we aren't all motivated by what we want. Some of us are motivated by avoiding what we don't want.

What is your Motivation Strategy?

Motivation comes in two (or more) flavors. You can be motivated towards something (what you'll gain) or you can be motivated away from something (what you'll lose). This desiring to avoid can be confusing. I'm saying you must want something, and you're thinking, but I don't want to be fat. I can't think about my future, only what I don't want. Here is what's going on:

Motivation: Toward

If you are motivated by what you'll gain you find it easy to look ahead and see your future shapely body, you'll see people around you with admiring glances, you'll hear their compliments, you'll smell the good food and feel good knowing you can eat enough to be satisfied, and then say you're full. You've had enough, thank you. You'll be in control of your life. You'll want what you visualize more than anything, and you'll do whatever it takes to get it. If asked what movie to go see, they'll have a few ideas, and tell you why.

Motivation: Away

If you are motivated by what you'll lose you'll focus on what you want to avoid. For example, you want to avoid dying, you want to avoid being too heavy to enjoy playing with the kids, you want to avoid gasping for breath when you climb a flight of stairs. You want to avoid the embarrassment, the humiliation of other people's remarks and rude glances. You don't want any of that anymore, and you don't want it to the extent that you'll do whatever it takes to avoid these things. If you ask them what they want for dinner, they'll tell you they don't want Chinese, or pizza. It can be difficult to get someone motivated this way to actually say what they do want!

Knowing your motivation strategy makes it easier to find methods that support your preferred strategy. If you are motivated toward, you may enjoy cutting our pictures of people in great shape with similar body types to yours. Find models wearing clothes that would look good on you, pictures of swimming pools, holiday places you'd enjoy; the types of things that go into a dream board.

If you motivated away, then make a list of what you want to avoid and elaborate on that list. Why don't you want these things? The more detailed you are, the more likely you'll truly do what it takes to avoid them.

Hopefully these ideas will get you thinking, and much about making changes in our lives comes down to thinking it through. Realizing what we really want can get us past the hurdles of what we already have. To affect change isn't necessarily comfortable, until you've worked at it for awhile, and then suddenly your changed behavior has become your new behavior and the effort is over.

Author Bio:

Kathryn Martyn, M.NLP

Kathryn Martyn, Master NLP Practitioner, EFT counselor, Weight Loss Coach and owner of OneMoreBite-WeightLoss.com is the author of "Changing Beliefs, Your First Step to Permanent Weight Loss," and "5 Steps to Blast Through Weight Loss Plateaus."

Kathryn was a curvy 16-year old when she met a boy who forever altered her life by uttering three little words. No, not, "I love you," but "You've gotten fat." She weighed all of 132 pounds at 5 foot 7 inches tall, a heathy weight for her.

That statement made her vow to never let him see her eat, and she kept that vow, yet at a very high cost. Whenever they were together she couldn't wait to leave so she could feed her desire for peace and comfort as well as quell her constant hunger pangs.

Denying hunger leads inevitably to eating far past full because we lose the ability to know when we've had enough or what enough even means. After the end of the boyfriend she began a relationship with food that also wasn't healthy. Eating enough for several people, buying enough groceries for a family of four despite living alone, and being diagnosed with high blood pressure at the tender age of 19.

She eventually realized she was unhealthy and unhappy with how she looked so she started to learn to get in touch with her "hungers." She taught herself to recognize what it felt to be satisfied with food. She read books about emotional eating, anorexia, bulimia and other eating disorders, owned a natural foods store, studied herbology and nutrition and discovered weight training for beauty.

Kathryn's gone from a low of 118 pounds to a high of 218 pounds. She knows how it feels to wake up every morning saying, "Today is the day I'm going to start eating right," and then by noon hearing, "Tomorrow would be better. Yeah, I'll start tomorrow."

Kathryn now maintains a healthy weight using the techniques in her 8-week Ending Emotional Eating online weight loss program, workshops and her one-on-one private weight loss coaching practice. Her motto is, "Every meal stands alone," which means no single thing you eat should cause, "Oh, well, I've blown it now," because you can't blow it. You can only overeat this one time. Your next meal is a separate event.

She's called the "Weight Loss Lady," because she get results when all else has failed.

Visit OneMoreBite-WeightLoss.come for articles and tips on losing weight and gaining health.

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